Son of god! All has gone to crap!!! Zygote, myself and the Suresh guy that does stuff for us from moment to moment are desperately poor! My keyboard's totally fucked. Me am unable to produce the letter that's between 'u' and 'o'. Me am sorry. Bear together me anyway. Me shall try to use words that dont need that exact button.

You know the letter me am talk about. The number 3 vowel of the england language. Me can't make that key on my keyboard work because my keyboard are fucked. Perhaps happened when me dropped coke-a-cola between the keys. AND THATS BECAUSE PERTH ROCK TOWN WEBPLACE ARE SO DAMN POOR WHEN NOBODY OFFERS US ANY MONEY SO WANGST CANT BUY A NEW KEYBOARD!!!! Were we to have sponsorboat me would be able to buy new computer stuff to make Perth Rock Town webplace together. Perhaps me shall ask the government for some money. A grant of some type. Or some sponsorboat from some company around town that wants advert.

Anyway. Me was plan to tell people about some recent news of the world. My broken keyboard can get fucked. Me shall do that stuff he planned anyway......

OF RECENT NEWS AROUND THE WORLD
"ba bah ba ba dah" (news start theme sounds here)

Sheep

The boat of the Arab ocean that has a whole poo load of dead and nearly dead sheep on that boat are go to come back to our country.

They are to be put of a huge fucker of a hole somewhere of the center of the desert.

Me loves to eat lamb chops. A sad moment that we have to throw away so much perfectly good food.

Boss-Man from that Country that has Kuala Lumpur as large town says mean words about Jew people.

Fuck me am hate not have a keyboard where all the keys work as they should. That last sentence of bold made no fuck sense at all!!!

Doctor Mahathere (guy from that country that starts on "Malays-") says at a conference for leaders from country where people are love a god named Allah, that Jews are bad and are try to make dead all the allah lovers.

Leaders from all the country where allah lovers are came out of support for Mahathere. The man from Egypt whose job are to talk about other country says that Mahatheres comments were "very smart".

John Howard says "Me thought very offend!". He went on to say, "Let me make very clear. Any warn of hate between Jews and Allah lovers are very unhelpful". Well thats whats he would have say were he to have a keyboard that doesn't work properly. He's actual words made much more sense.

Ponce Harry flys onto Perth

HAHAHAHAH! Look at that bold sentence me made! Me am funny when me can't use the full keyboard!!!!

Ponce Harry who comes from England and are number 3 to be the boss of the Royal people of England came to Perth the other day to watch the rugby Leauge. The game he shall watch am England versus the South country on that huge place where black people are.

Ponce Harry seems to be somewhat of a cockhead to me. He doesnt want any reporters or cameramen to take photos of heself. What a tosser. When the people of our country want to take photos of Ponce Harry they should be allowed to and the young Ponce of England should not be allowed to stop them. Wealthy people don't get to have secrets.

Apparently to be extra sure that nobody can take photos of Harry, he are go to the Rugby game and wear a novelty supporters toupee (of the england colors) and some face grease (of the england colors) so nobody can know who he am!! What a tosser! When you go to the Rugby and you want to know who are Ponce Harry, just look out for the guy dressed to be a total Pommy Twat!! That are be Ponce Harry! So take lots and lots of photo of that guy!!! Actually just take lots of photo of any England twat and one of them are be Ponce Harry for sure!!!!

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Well that was fucked. Can somebody gave us some money? We shall gave somestuff of return. Me swear that on my mothers grave (God rest her soul). Maybe we can offer people some adverts? We shall tell people who come to our webplace that your product are very good and that they should go out and buy some of them.

For example were Nova FM to come to us and say "We shall gave you some money so you can buy a new keyboard!" We would say "GREAT! WE SHALL TELL THE PEOPLE WHO COME TO OUR WEBPLACE THAT YOUR SOUNDBOX PLACE ARE GOOD AND PLAYS GREAT SONGS THAT TEENAGERS LOVE TO DANCE TO." Only we would do better then that because by that moment we would have a brand new keyboard to create words on.

Or maybe were the man from the Burswood dome to ask us we could say on our webplace "HURRY HURRY HURRY!!! GET ON DOWN TO THE BURSWOOD DOME WHERE YOU CAN BUY BRAS UNDERWEAR CLOTHS OF ALL TYPES FOR CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP! NEVER TO BE REPEATED MONEY DEMANDS!!!" maybe then that guy would gave us money? The punters probably wouldn't be able to tell what are not the same about our adverts and the adverts they currently use!! HAHAHAHA

So yeah. Send me an e-message were you maybe happy to gave us some sponsorboat! We need that really badly so we can buy new keyboards!! One that can say the 3rd vowel letter of the alphabet please!!

Posted by Wangst McPants at October 19, 2003 12:49 AM