Apple?!
BOB Geldof's daughter Peaches yesterday warned that Gwyneth Paltrow's one-week-old girl Apple faces years of taunting at school.
Peaches, 14, whose middle name is Honeyblossom, said: "At primary school I got teased a lot, just as little Apple will."
Fellow pupils used to shout: "Oi, Peaches, are your parents bananas?" Other taunts which still annoy her include "I'd like to take a bite out of that peach" and "Look at those peaches".
Gwyneth and Coldplay singer husband Chris Martin have joined celebrities such as Geldoff and his late wife Paula Yates who opt for the unusual. Peaches said: "Why do the rich and famous give their children such ridiculous names?
"Mine has haunted me all my life, and will continue to do so.
"I am named after a fruit. This doesn't make sense at all."
In her Sunday Telegraph column, she added: "When I tell people my name, most laugh incredulously. I'm always asked to repeat it twice." But her name is normal compared to rocker Frank Zappa's daughter Moon-Unit and David Bowie's son Zowie.
And it does help her stand out from the crowd.
She said: "It's exotic, it's not boring. It also gives me (or so I like to think) an air of mystery."
SOURCE: http://www.mirror.co.uk/
Well isn't that just great. Yet another celebrity couple, clearly addled by the copious drugs they consume, have decided to name their son/daughter something totally fucking stupid.
I guess i'll know when I have truly reached the big-time when I feel a strange desire to reach into a fruit salad, grab something, and name the fruit of my loins after whatever fruits are in the palm of my hand.
God damnit! How much cooler are Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston than Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow. Brad makes well wicked films like that new one where he fights Ancient Greek guys. Jennifer Aniston makes that quite humerous TV show with Lisa Kudrow. You know the one im talking about. The one where they are all friends. And what the fuck has Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow ever done for the world? Martin makes god awful shit-pop (you like that play on words? Clever no? Rather then brit-pop I said shit-pop). And Paltrow! Don't EVEN get me started on Paltrow! Well ok get me started! Some actors are method actors. Some actors just read their lines and are interesting enough individuals to get away with playing themselves. Then there is Gwyneth Paltrow. Who, it seems to me, must surely get out a block of wood and stare at it for 10 minutes before going before a camera. She must surely say to herself "
What can I do, to be more like this piece of wood while I am acting? How can I find new and ingenious ways to convince audiences that I am not actually an actress, but rather a very wooden piece of wood, shaped like a woman"
May god have mercy apon the soul of Apple Martin. A girl who will grow up to act like a block of wood, sing shitty songs and undoubtedly get beaten like a red-headed step child every day of her life.
Posted by ExistAngst at May 25, 2004 02:31 AM