Calire Amazoslafontz
Office of Equal Opportunites
Murdoch University

Dear Calire,

RE: BLATENT DISCRIMINATION

I am a mature aged student and I would like to report some discriminatory behaviour and attitudes. Yesterday in my Introduction to University Learning lecture my fellow students and I suffered the misfortune of being addressed by a lefty, femmo-nazi who is completely against men! She hates us and, although she said she wasn?t it was clear that she is a lesbian. I could tell because she didn?t look like Halle Berry or Sandra Bullock like good heterosexual women do.

I wasn?t really sure exactly what in her argument I actually disagreed with so at first I just grunted loudly, folded my arms and shifted my chair around a bit. But one thing is certain: women have to have children because men can?t so that makes the whole feminist thing null and void. End of story. Nobody should take biology so personally. I don?t whinge because my penis, after years of neglect and abuse, now resembles a vanilla pod- its just biology and its natural. Anyway, I tried to tell her that during the lecture ? I yelled from my seat in the front row but she didn?t understand what my argument was because she is a woman (a lesbian what?s more) and they aren?t very good at logic. They always complicate things irrationally.

Women are too materialistic these days. I am a really genuine, nice guy but women don?t want to get to know me because I am only a mechanic and cannot afford to buy nice things for them like clock radios and video cassette recorders.

But I think one of my tutors wants to get to know me. She tutors for PL101:Australian Government- a subject that I am really good at because I listen to Howard Sattler every day. She isn?t a lesbian (she looks a bit like the lady from Getaway who is also a good heterosexual) and I always put my hand up in her class. She even suggested that I see her after class one day so she can show me something called the ?inter-net?. But I think she really wants to listen to more of my life experience wisdom. I don?t think she has ever met anybody who has a real outlook that is simple but right because she has spent too much time at Murdoch with the lesbians and not enough time in the real world. She should listen to Howard Sattler more as I find him to be informative and to be a good Australian. I?m sure I can set her straight. Maybe one day we can listen to him together or even go to one of his outside broadcasts at Belmont Race Course or Claremont Show Grounds or something.

Anyway I am clearly a maverick for speaking up for men. Nobody sticks up for them these days and since I clearly invented the notion that sexism works both ways I hope you feel stupid for being an irrational woman who has herself never considered this possibility.

Yours truly,

Some random mature aged git.

PS: I?ve seen you around the campus and you are probably a lesbian also.

Posted by Calire Amazoslafontz at April 9, 2004 10:57 PM