Tsunami! Tsunami!
Oh Tsunami! Oh Happy Days!
Well I have to tell you people. I am in a state of dazed euphoria! Hasn't the Tsunami been a blast? It is like one great big festival! With the giving and the feeling good about ourselves and the excellently entertaining news we have been getting on the TV. Whole resorts being wiped away with the rising flood waters. Huge tsunami waves picking the children off one by one as they cling for their dear pagan lives to the nearest coconut tree. Hasn't it just been a pleasure to turn on the TV! Turning on the TV to watch Ray Martin talking to the top Aussie diggers in Aceh. And Ray is thinking "if I touch this Soldier boy enough and make good enough kissy faces at him will he let me fellate him?" And Private Whogivesafuck is thinking "HOLY CHRIST I AM TALKING TO RAY MARTIN! THIS GUY IS GOD! HOLY FUCKING CHRIST ITS RAY MARTIN, REPRESENTATIVE OF THE ORDINARY PEOPLE OF AUSTRALIA!"
And I played my part. Yup. Thats right. I got nothing in the world to feel guilty about because I just donated $50 to the Tsunami appeal. $50 dollars is what we are giving these days isnt it? What did Jack and Laura next door give? $200!!! Are you serious? Oh my! We will look terrible. She knew I was going to donate $50 and she did this to make me look bad!! That bitch! I will donate $1,000 lets see what she thinks about that!!!
Ahem. As I was saying....
I have nothing to feel guilty about anymore. From now on I have earned the right to walk past the homeless man outside McDonalds and not care about where his next meal is coming from. Cause its not my fault. I dont have to think about it. Someone else can deal with it. I am absolved of guilt. Because I donated to the Tsunami appeal. I can push into traffic with reckless abandon. I can cut people off, run red lights and honk my horn at the cop car in front of me. Because I donated to the tsunami appeal. I can do as I please.
I turned on the TV and watched the live footage on the News. Like something out of an old biblical movie, the dirty waves gushed down the streets of those Asian nations that share the tragic destiny of a coastline with the Indian Ocean. I pretended, like everyone else to find it horribly upsetting. But it was never quite real enough to be truly upsetting. I donated to the Tsunami appeal like everyone else. That, a mere month ago, I had almost no idea where Sri Lanka is located on a map and definitely no interest in what went on there is beside the point. I showed the level of conspicuous compassion required of me. Can I please go back to living my drab little life? Not caring, not feeling, not thinking, just getting on with it.
Posted by ExistAngst at January 11, 2005 03:03 AM
Is it just me? Or does everyone else think that you when you see Ray 'the helmet' Martin reporting from Aceh you can practically see his mind ticking over thinking "I'm definitely going to get a Logie for this one. All the dead bodies I show, all the caring, I'm definitely Logie bound. Bit like that Mark Reading guy when he was in Bali that time"
News for you Helmet, you're a fucking hore! Its shit, people died, we know... lots of bodies, smells bad etc... stop exploiting it ya disgusting fuck!